Farewell, my lovelies … ha ha ha … or be seeing you … I hope … on this blog.
Finally, for what it’s worth, here’s the end of my young adult novel, which is totally not a spoiler. I hope my writers group doesn’t think it sucks too much. Here goes:
So that’s all I got. If you’re looking for some sort of moral, I couldn’t tell you what it is. Don’t follow strange boys riding on buses? Don’t lie to your parents? Don’t do stupid things just to be accepted? Feel free to take your pick.
I guess the point is that we all have to make choices. Up until three years ago, I never really had to live with mine. I was always moving from one place to another, so I didn’t have to choose to be anything anywhere. However, things changed, once we settled here and I had to decide who my real friends were.
I’ve heard we are the sum total of our choices. I’ve never been sure exactly what that meant until now. I’d like to think I add up to someone worth knowing.
Life is like a weird, crazy movie. It’s totally like that novel, The Sound and the Fury. Have you ever read it? If not, I’ll save you the trouble.
It starts out as gibberish – a tale told by a true idiot. Half the time, you have no idea what’s going on. Slowly, the pieces come together. And just as it all starts to make some kind of sense, it ends – inconclusively. That’s it. You’re welcome.
THE END
So … should I take a bow? Ha ha ha …
Be seeing you, I hope.
UPDATE: They liked it! My writer’s group liked the story. In fact, I know what I must do to make it even better.
Hi there! It’s becoming painfully clear that this blog must be archived. It won’t be deleted. It will be preserved. As an example of … whatever. How to be a doofus? Ha ha ha … I don’t know.
I’m not shutting it down just yet. This is just an early warning that subscribers might want to switch over to this blog, where I posted something today.
Most of the interesting links are over there, except these …
Hi there! I think it’s high time to drop the pretense that I’m a mid-list author, don’t you? In point of fact, I’m just a writer, period.
As a writer, I started this blog to establish an online presence. Now, given that I should be using my blog to reach readers, here’s some things you might like to know about Sam McRae, the protagonist in my mystery series. Please click there to “like” it on Facebook, okay?
Well, let me tell you, Stephanie Ann “Sam” McRae is a tough-talking, lawyer-sleuth, and champion for the underdog. The series is set in the Maryland suburbs, between Baltimore and Washington.
While Sam doesn’t seek out danger, it occasionally finds her. Having been orphaned while young, Sam is willing to go the distance for her clients, because she knows the system from both sides. As a result, she feels an intense loyalty and sense of duty to those in need.
Now, in case you’re wondering, the Baltimore-DC suburbs where Sam works look nothing like this …
In fact, here are actual headlines from the local news:
Apartment complex for homeless planned in North Laurel. Laurel, MD has a BIG homelessness problem. And lots of prostitutes doing business along Route One. Sam could get involved in a case related to those issues. Interested?
“In the final analysis, the whole cause of world revolution hinges on the revolutionary struggles of the Asian, African and Latin American people who make up the overwhelming majority of the world’s population”
Hi there! We went to Ireland and the UK this summer, and while we were in Scotland, I climbed 287 steps just to say I did it and get this picture and view!
However, I really do give all readers choices. My novels are available as ebooks here now. Thank you, Eamon Moroney, for the info about Bkclb.
So … after lunch, I took a walk with my husband, during which we discussed whether high school girls would refer to other students as “kids” or not. We have no kids, so I don’t know. Anyone out there know? Anyone with kids? LOL!
Then, I sat down and prepared a shitty rough outline of my speech for the Sisters in Crime, Richmond Chapter. And I still had time afterward to work on my novel and write this post. Because that’s my job, and I’m a blue collar writer, a blogger, and a happy fool.
And here’s the shitty rough outline. Read it and weep laugh or whatever.
Introduce myself, explain my series, the NYTimes list, etc.
Never intended to make a career as a self-published author. My first novel was published by small press in 2005, but went out of print 9 months later when the publisher went under.
Shortly before the novel went out of print, I suffered a stroke and developed a rare movement disorder called dystonia.
Despite these setbacks, I kept writing freelance and fiction. I submitted my work to agents and small presses, and kept doing so after I decided to bring my first novel back into print through Lulu.com.
Around the time I got ready to publish through Lulu, I read about publishing ebooks for Kindle on Joe Konrath’s and Lee Goldberg’s blogs. I decided to do so.
I started off pricing my ebooks at $1.59, but dropped the price to $.99 to see if it would help sales. My sales shot through the roof. Naturally, they would compared to the prices charged by publishers, which were unreasonably high. And who wouldn’t try something new, if it was cheap? I was selling myself short, in the hopes of gaining greater exposure. I knew this wasn’t a sustainable business practice, but I hoped that I could come away with something to show for it.
When the New York Times announced it was going to include indie authors on its bestseller list, I kept my prices low and hoped, despite the scoffing of someone who won’t be named. When I actually hit the list, I couldn’t believe it. The whole experience seemed surreal, yet when I contacted local papers with press releases about the news, no one cared.
Here’s what it boils down to: the only reason I made the NY Times list was that I sold a whole lot of downloads cheap for Kindle and Nook. I get 4 and 5 star reviews, so I write the best books I can. I don’t pay for reviews. But I hit the market at the right time, too.
Amazon has used the publishing business’ bad business practices against it to take over. It’s obviously trying to become the one and only publisher, i.e., the ultimate gatekeeper.
I assure you, the speech will go nothing like this one. There will be no tears. I’m no longer taking myself so seriously.
This blog will take a break for Thanksgiving. I’m grateful that I’m able to write and go places and do things. I have a loving husband and a funny sister and an awesome brother, and their kids are awesome. All of them. Each and every one. Please don’t make me type all the names. You know who you are.
UPDATE: Oh, crap! I forgot to mention that yesterday was World Toilet Day. Here’s a weirdlybizarrely curiously an appropriate tune for this post from Nik Nak’s Old Peculiar.
And this quote:
“The principle, in building a sewer system, was of diverting the cause of the mischief to a locality where it can do no mischief.”
Ha ha ha … it’s been a while, so I’m sure you (yes, you reading this here blog) were wondering if I were 1) deaddeceased no longer with the living or whatever; 2) had fallen and couldn’t get up — ha ha ha …; and/or 3) had possibly had my face or [insert body part] ripped off by an escalator or other mechanical device.
However, let me threaten assure you that they haven’t killed me I’m not dead yet. Ha ha ha …
My husband and I just got back from our awesome trip to Ireland and the UK. I’ve come to think of those countries as The Place of Many Stairs. Ha ha ha … Just ask my gimpy foot. And my barking left thigh, which hurt so much, I kept having to beg ask my husband to slow the fuck down, and no I wasn’t deliberately trying to walk behind him like a geisha, I just wanted to slow the fuck down even more. Really!
Yet, I climbed 287 of those mutherfuckers to get to the top of Sir Walter Scott’s Tower in Edinburgh. I think.
I’m so jet lagged and whacked out from these stupid dystonia drugs that don’t even work, I can’t even remember which Scottish city that tower was in, for sure. I hope I got it right. I could Google it, but I’m too gimpy and too tired and I don’t care.
Okay, I lied. I do care. So, I looked it up in my Lonely Planet guidebook. The print book. Ha ha ha … I think that’s funny for some reason. Probably because I’m jet lagged and on drugs that don’t work right. And I’m blogging, even though the fingers on my left hand can barely move. But it’s called rehabilitation. So, that’s why I must keep typing. So, please, don’t suggest that I use DragonSpeak, okay? Because then my fingers won’t be used at all, and they’ll be totally fucked. Like they aren’t already. Ha ha ha … #iamfoolish
But I digress. It was Edinburgh, okay? I climbed that damn tower, and I really felt like I’d accomplished something, even if it almost fucking killed me.
We’ll eventually have the pictures to prove all of this. Really!
Naturally, now that I’m back in the US of A, I’d like to nag remind you that all my books are half off in July on Smashwords. Click here to access the books and enter SSW50 to get the discount. You can also buy all my books novels in print, of course. Including my latest novel (see above), RIPTIDE. It was published by Renegade Press last month. You can actually get it through Barnes & Noble, and even Amazon or Amazon UK.
Also, one of the first things I did today was publish LEAST WANTED and RIPTIDE directly to the Kobo publishing platform. If you click here, you’ll see the books published in July 2012. Those are the ones published directly to Kobo, as opposed to the ones distributed through Smashwords, which I’m in the process of pulling off the virtual shelves.
I will get to the other books later, when I’m feeling a bit more like a real human being and less like a blogging zombie with crappy fingers. Ha ha ha …
Meanwhile, here’s a great photo of Paul Downie’s friend Trevor. We met Paul and Trevor in Brentwood, Essex, England, and had espresso at Cafe Nero.
Paul’s awesome friend, Trevor
And here’s me and my husband. Paul took the pictures and sent them to me. So, I’ll put photos of Paul up later.
Me and some handsome guy at Cafe Nero
Sometimes the universe is just, and my hair looks decent.
Outside THE Brentwood Library
Yes. This is the very library where I made the donation so many years months ago. Seems like a lifetime, doesn’t it? Or maybe it just feels like it to me, because of the constant screaming in my head. I’m trapped in a torture chamber and I can’t get out. But I choose to be happy about it, because I have no other options. Well … one other, but I choose not to die. Ha ha ha … #iamfoolish
So, anyhow, here’s some stuff I saw on the Web, and while I was going through my 50 million many emails today:
Congrats, Ray Flynt, on your awesome review of BLOOD PORN! From Kirkus, no less. Damn, those assholessnobs guys don’t like anything. Way to go, dude!
And on that note, before I pass out, I couldn’t help noticing that yesterday was Raymond Chandler’s birthday, according to Paul Downie’s blog.
And Paul included a quotation that he thought might be appropriate. And it totally was. To wit:
“I bent over and took hold of the room with both hands and spun it. When I had it nicely spinning I gave it a full swing and hit myself on the back of the head with the floor.” Pearls Are A Nuisance, Raymond Chandler July 23, 1888 – March 26, 1959
Sounds like the way I feel rightnow. Ha ha ha …
And here’s the song from the teaser, the title of which coincidentally (or not) was the inscription I wrote on his copy of RIPTIDE.
Hi, there! Ha ha ha … yeah, I only wish. The actual woman who inspired that poster dropped deaddiedexpired passed away a long time ago. In fact, I wrote this post about her. Isn’t that interesting?
So … on Friday, after (to put it mildly) a rough day, I posted this on another blog.
On Saturday morning, while I was eating breakfast, I happened to catch this movie. It’s a film noir. Basically, Barbara Stanwyck makes all the wrong choices in order to help her husband or herself — one or the other. Ha ha ha …
It’s called Crime of Passion. Everyone should see this movie as soon as possible. Because it’s crucial to make the right choices.
Now, I’d really love if everyone simply clicked on the link, but since many of you won’t, I’ll copy and paste the pertinent part. So … here we go. Again!
As metaphors go, it’s a pretty horrible one. But it sure beats the hell out of this one. Ha ha ha …
And, fortunately, I’m a happy fool. So I can laugh at my own calamities. Ha ha ha … #iamfoolish
Having said that, I’ve tried to point out that Amazon has been moving toward monopolizing the market ever since I posted this. Frankly, I suspect that’s been the plan all along, I just didn’t realize it.
So … when I chose not to be part of Amazon’s KDP Select program, it was with the hope that this would give other retailers and publishers a fighting chance, because we all benefit as consumers and authors from having multiple choices and income streams, right?
It was a choice made knowing that I couldn’t in good conscience talk out of both sides of my mouth, by supporting indie bookstores here and lending support to the company that sought to put them out of business.
I’m many things, but I’m not a hypocrite.
So Not Me!
If I were the amazing Bloggess, I’d Photoshop a line through that image. Unfortunately, I’m too technically stupid to do that.
Shit, with a hand like this, I’m lucky I can type this post.
And I always wondered about the picture with the curlers. Now, we know the story. Thanks, Jenny. Awesome! #furiouslyhappy
But I digress. Not really. The point is that authors, publishers and booksellers need to look toward the mighty Bloggess, who knows how to use the Internet. This lady rocks the Internet like no one’s business.
Anyhow, as I was saying, when I was at Malice, I even spoke to Lee Goldberg, an Amazon author who’s part of their A-list with a multi-book deal, about the future of bookstores and how indie bookstores fit into the picture.
And Lee and some other authors seemed to think that indie booksellers would just see the light or something and carry Amazon books. And I’m thinking, Now, why the fuck would they do that? What economic voodoo justifies such a decision? But I simply listened and nodded and thought that publishing was a fucked up business model that needed fixing and until that happened, it stood no hope.
And, as I recall, Lee Goldberg called himself “the luckiest Jew in the world” at Malice. I think there’s a joke in there somewhere, but I don’t want to make it. Ha ha ha #iamfoolish
Why is this man smiling?
Mind you, I’m not a mind reader, but I don’t think this man offered money to authors simply out of the goodness of his heart. Do you? This man is a business man, whose ruthless tactics have been justified by the authors he’s been “kind” enough to publish. Ha ha ha …
Perhaps he’s thinking, “Wow. All I have to do is throw some spare change to a bunch of lazy authors. And they’ll scoop it up, and I’ll take over publishing. And then I’ll do whatever I want.” Ha ha ha …
“Yeah, they’ll scramble for the money, because I’ll be in charge. They’ll scramble like cockroaches over each other for the crumbs I throw them.” Ha ha ha …
In fact, the metaphor that came to mind to describe having dystonia was being like Gregor in that Kafka novel, Metamorphosis. Being helpless, on your back, legs waving in the air. Thinking, “This isn’t fair! Why me?”
Meanwhile, I’m really quietly freaking out looking forward to pulling off Operation Doofus, which I should mention includes Ireland and the UK. I want to meet everyone all over, but I’m way too gimpylazy tired to type all your names. But I thought I would make a special mention of Stephen Leather, as he was one of the first authors I got to know over there! Ha ha ha … Over there! Get it? Ha ha ha … #iamfoolish
Authors, the Kobo self-publishing platform is coming soon. Sign up here!
I don’t believe it. For once I agree with Gina Barreca, except for that bit at the end about Kindles and Nooks. Or am I kidding myself? Again. Ha ha ha … #iamfoolish
If I weren’t so gimpy busy trying to make a living as a writer, I’d visit these islands more often. I love to watch birds from my porch, but sometimes it’s all I can do just to write a decent blog post, let alone my novels.
“This isn’t about limiting competition,” said Gerard Boarman, part owner of North Ridge Wine and Spirits in Ellicott City. “This about allowing a grocery store, chain store, box store, whatever you want to call it to have a liquor license.”
PS: David Wayne, I’m really not famous, even though I’m a New York Times ebook bestselling author. But I’m alive and moving and that’s what matters. And I’m going to Ireland and the UK, if it freaking kills me. And it will be awesome.
PPS: Last night, we watched a little Perry Mason and a bunch of old Dick Tracy short films, which made me laugh like crazy.
And, if we’re feeling up to it, we might watch this film. One of my very favorites that my husband introduced me to, so many years ago.
Ha ha ha …
I love that scene. I also love this one.
I must admit, the first time I saw this I recoiled a bit. Then, I thought, hey, he’s a Nazi lover. He chose wrongly. So … he just has to pay the price, doesn’t he? And he’s trying to kill Richard Burton. For Pete’s sake. Now, how fucked up is that? So … clearly, this man must die screaming. Too bad, huh?
Ha ha ha … #iamfoolish
PPS: To one of my most awesome supporters and readers, Paul Downie, thank you so much!
I’ll quote myself, because I can’t believe I wrote this:
This also got me to thinking that if I’d never had the stroke and developed dystonia, I might never have organized a fundraiser. Which means I might never have known my own capabilities.
So, maybe good things came out of my bad situation. And everything that’s happened — being a fiction writer, having a stroke, organizing a fundraiser, self-publishing — everything in my life was meant to lead up to this point. Or not.
OMFG!!!!
So things have been a bit surreal (via Nik Nak’s Old Peculiar), to say the least.
Plus I’m still hoping like hell to get this book published in print by month’s end.
Pray for me. Here’s hoping, eh?
UPDATE: Holy shit! It’s Lawrence Block’s birthday. Happy birthday, Lawrence Block!!!
UPDATE 2: I almost forgot to mention that because of Where Eagles Dare, I nearly chose this image as my Facebook avatar.
The Awesome Mary Ure
Mary Ure was so awesome in that movie. She got Richard Burton and Clint Eastwood inside the castle. And she got to fire guns at the Nazis. Plus she had to walk through the snow without an electrically-heated suit. All by herself. After jumping out of a plane.
And if this makes no fucking sense, you need to see this movie, as soon as possible. Trust me, you won’t regret it. It’s got explosions and Richard Burton and Clint Eastwood and Mary Ure, and they’re all awesome!
Well, for good or ill, that same image is taken on Facebook in a fan page devoted to Mary Ure. So, I pretend to be Mrs. Peel on Facebook. For now.
Hi there! I just happened to notice that it’s Flag Day. I wasn’t planning to have a big fancy celebration, actually. Not that I don’t love my country. I do, but I don’t have to hire a band or hold a party for the flag to prove I love my country, you know?
But I digress …
My point is that I forgot to mention one other thing that good old Barry Eisler failed to bring up, when I wrote this post.
Professor Kingsfield would be sooo disappointed. He’d no doubt say, “Ms. Mack, you didn’t come prepared. Here’s a dime. Go call your mother and tell her that you just don’t have what it takes to be a soldierauthorbloggerpublisher lawyer.” Or whatever. Ha ha ha …
The Justice Department is conducting a wide-ranging antitrust investigation into whether cable companies are acting improperly to quash nascent competition from online video, according to people familiar with the matter.
Justice Department officials have spoken to several online video providers, including Netflix Inc. NFLX -0.27% and Hulu LLC, those people said. Investigators have also questioned Comcast Corp., CMCSA +2.43%Time Warner Cable Inc. TWC +1.17% and other cable companies about issues such as setting data caps, limits to the amount of data a subscriber can download each month, these people said.
Representatives of all those companies and the Justice Department declined to comment on the investigation.
Cable companies provide both television channels and high-speed Internet access for many consumers in the U.S. With broadband Internet, consumers can watch individual programs or channels through online video services like Netflix, Hulu or Amazon, bypassing the cable company’s traditional bundles of channels.
Having invested billions of dollars building their networks, some pay-TV companies have shown little inclination to get out of the business of packaging television channels and become mere conduits for other companies’ data. Some major entertainment companies also have an interest in preserving the current model of television viewing because they want cable companies to take bundles of their channels, rather than just cherry-picking the most popular ones.
The Justice Department probe highlights how the shifts in decades-old patterns of television viewing are shaking the tightly regulated industry. Decisions in Washington could play a role in determining how quickly the new video services spread and what form they take.
Already the Justice Department’s Antitrust Division has jolted another fast-growing Internet industry, e-book publishing, by bringing a lawsuit alleging that publishers and Apple Inc. AAPL -0.10% colluded to fix prices. In April, several publishers settled the charges while Apple and other publishers continue to fight the suit.
Interesting, isn’t it? Especially since Amazon is getting into filmmaking and TV programming and Netflix and all that stuff. But I guess the Justice Department didn’t come prepared for class must have missed the connection somehow.
The Justice Department also is investigating the contracts that programmers sign in order to be distributed on cable systems. Some contracts include so-called most-favored nation clauses, which make programmers give the biggest cable companies the best price they are offering anywhere, among other conditions. The Justice Department is questioning whether there are legitimate business reasons for such terms or whether they are intended to stop programmers from experimenting with other forms of online distribution, a person familiar with the matter said.
Most-favored-nation clauses are also an issue in the e-books case, where Apple sought to ensure that publishers gave the Apple online bookstore the best price available.
Attorney General Eric Holder on Tuesday suggested he had sympathy for those who want to “cut the cord” rather than paying for cable channels they don’t watch. At a Senate hearing, Sen. Al Franken (D., Minn.) said cable bills are “out of control” and consumers want to watch TV and movies online. Mr. Holder responded, “I would be one of those consumers.”
Mr. Holder, here’s a dime. I suggest you call your mother and tell her the Justice Department doesn’t know what the fuck it’s doing.
Meanwhile, I’m working like a dog really hard to get the print edition of RIPTIDE published this month. Honest!
In gratitude and acknowledgement to Paul for all his kind support, here’s a song I remember fondly from way back when, which he posted on his blog.
And to all my subscribers and frequent readers, thank you SO much! Hopefully, there will be no updates, because I’m a lazy bastard. Ah ha ha ha …
So, I clicked on the link and thought, “Yeah, right Oh, goody! Please, I want to learn more!”
And here’s what HanBarryAmazon the article says (and I quote):
It’s inspiring when a successful author goes out of his way to help others in the craft of writing. Barry Eisler is one of those good guys.
Though he’d probably rather be known as one baaad dude.
He’s a one-time CIA operative, a judo black belt and an intellectual property attorney, who’s also a bestselling writer of political thrillers in a seven-book series featuring a freelance assassin, the latest one titled The Detachment.
Wow! That’s impressive. Did you know that I’m also an attorney. And a New York Times bestselling author. But does that really matter anymore? Ha ha ha … Yes, the cosmic joke is on me, isn’t it? Or is it?
Eisler speaks regularly at writers conferences and offers a treasure trove of resources for writers on his own website. He’s also famous for turning down a $500K advance from his publisher to go with Amazon. This fellow thinks for himself.
Oh, really? I also speak at as many writers conferences as I can afford to attend. I also share resources for writers on this blog. And, we’ll see who thinks for herself and who doesn’t, okay?
I saw him in action at the Grub Street Muse & the Marketplace conference in Boston last month where he spoke at length on how to write better and get published. Eisler’s a charismatic and flamboyant public speaker – charming, funny, articulate. He literally leapt around the room, flinging aside drapes and throwing open all the windows to the frigid air.
“People shut the windows and close the curtains when they want to sleep,” Eisler said, sounding like the exasperated parent of a recalcitrant child.
However, I’ve managed to grit my teeth and give this presentation.
Now, despite the fact that I’m constantly squashing my hand against my thigh and my shoe is in imminent danger of falling off, due to the constant need to press both against something to counteract the clenching, I manage to say things that seem to make some sort of sense. In fact, people have told me they found my advice helpful. So, that’s awesome.
As a result, I have a tendency to embed this video a lot in my blog, because it saves me a whole lot of typing. In fact, I can barely find the strength to type this post.
But, I’m doing this because I want authors and readers to wake up!
On learning the craft of writing
There is always craft behind the art, Eisler said. “And craft must be learned if you want to be an artist.”
He thinks one of the best ways to improve your craft is to read like a writer.
“Read first for pleasure, then reread to see why it works so well,” Eisler said. “Discern if something’s good or bad and why. If it’s good, what works so well? If it’s bad, figure out how you would fix it.”
For example, Eisler says, “An opening sentence that just describes the setting is just a still life.” The opening he describes as “the most masterful” he’s ever come across is from the historical thriller The Key to Rebecca by Ken Follett:
“The last camel collapsed at noon.”
Yeah, and my interest in Barry’s advice collapsed at this point.
Barry went on to provide a list, which he called “Barry Eisler’s Rules of Craft.” And I must say that for an intellectual property lawyer, you have one huge set of balls claiming ownership of rules as elemental and timeless as 1) show don’t tell; 2) engage all senses; 3) keep writing 4) read books on writing; and 5) ask “what if?” — boy, those are really original rules. Thanks so much for sharing these, Barry!
Eisler was adamant about the value of working with a professional editor.
“Of course I need an editor,” Eisler said. “All writers need editors.”
Eisler is one of the best-known authors to take on the traditional book industry, and is a strategic player in the complex and often devious game of book publishing today. In March of last year, Barry made big news by turning down a $500K advance from St. Martins/Macmillan to instead make a profit-sharing deal with Amazon. His decision was widely reported as a tipping point for a struggling book business flummoxed by the thriving self-publishing movement.
Eisler can get really steamed up on the subject of self-publishing, eBooks vs. paper, the future of traditional publishing, and what he sees as the true phenomenon and impact of Amazon.
Now, Barry. One must keep a cool head when presenting a case. Didn’t they teach you that in law school? Professor Kingsfield would be soooo disappointed.
At Grub Street in Boston, speaking at a session about Amazon and publishing Eisler said, “The Big 6 Legacy publishers are a cartel – OK, let’s call them a club – that pays royalties in lockstep, and reports them in byzantine statements.” Moreover, Eisler added, the consistent lack of competition resulted in no innovation in the past two or three decades.
Here’s Eisler’s bottom line on getting published, from his website’s section called For Writers :
“All writers think of what they do as an art. Smart writers understand that writing is also a business. Really smart writers see themselves also as entrepreneurs.”
Writing the book is only the first step. “You are now running a company (albeit a sole proprietorship), and your company is responsible not only for creating the product, but also for marketing, branding, and selling it.”
Gee, Barry, really? What have I been saying? Twice. In fact, I say it a lot of times on this blog, and I’d embed each link, except no one cares and I’m way too gimpy.
Paper and print books are becoming a niche market for people born before the advent of e-book readers like Kindle, the iPad, and the Nook.
“The question isn’t, will paper disappear? Did firearms eliminate the bow and arrow? No–some enthusiasts still hunt with a bow. Did the automobile eliminate the horse and buggy? No–I can still get a buggy ride around Central Park if I want.”
Publishing houses as we know them today are probably doomed. They’re still selling paper, an increasingly expensive commodity that requires millions of trees, huge warehouses, complex and expensive shipping, storage, returns.
Oh, dear. Here’s where the curtains come crashing down on your own argument, Barry. You’ve signed a deal with Amazon, right? And that deal includes print distribution. So … this isn’t about ebooks versus print at all, is it?
Amazon has initiated a broad variety of self-publishing programs for everything from grandma’s recipes to substantial books of quality literature by serious and often previously successful authors, thereby establishing a direct route from writer to reader without the need for gatekeepers or intermediaries.
You can read more on Eisler’s website, from an incendiary conversation with Joe Konrath in a 150 page pdf called Be the Monkey.
Which is what led to this horrible realization. That if Amazon became the only publisher, it would also be the one and only gatekeeper.
BTW, Barry, you were betrayed by the indiscreet words of one of your own. An author accepted into your A-list fold, who said (essentially), Thank God I don’t have to be a mid-list author, anymore. Now, I have an Amazon contract and I’ll get my promotional and marketing support from them.
On that note, let’s end with an awesome video from Nik Nak’s Old Peculiar that made me feel joy, for all sorts of reasons.
PS: Regarding the question in this tweet, maybe it’s because authors have been fooled convinced by you and Konrath into thinking that Amazon is where they must list their books in order to succeed.
MOTION TO VACATE ORDER AND APPOINT MEDIATOR IN USA V. APPLE, INC. ET AL.
May it please the court of public opinion, I, Stephanie Ann “Sam” McRae, representing the author Debbi Mack, hereby seek to intervene in this litigation for purposes of filing a motion to vacate this order and appoint a mediator to resolve the dispute.
In support of this motion, I submit the following evidence and assertions:
Mack later learned that, in order for an ebook to qualify for the New York Times list, it must sell in large enough numbers through more than one retailer, which her book IDENTITY CRISIS did;
The court’s decision, for all intents and purposes, finds the allegations strongly suggest a horizontal conspiracy, which would require all publishers to participate in order to create a genuine cartel;
Amazon is a publisher and a retailer, as well as a technology company;
Amazon not did not participate in the alleged conspiracy, thus not all publishers participated in it;
Mack also submits the Shatzkin Letter to support her contention that the publishing business is screwy as hell needs to adapt to changing times quickly;
The publishing business is so fucked up weird, it requires all the affected parties to adapt to changes due to technology, which would include not only publishers, but bookstores;
She also submits the Wired Magazine article to support her contention that we should all be shitting our collective pants acting quickly as possible to reach agreement for positive change;
Exhibit A
Finally, I beg the court’s indulgence for the belated nature of this motion. My client has nothing but lame excuses to offer, and babbles on blogs like a fool about her epiphanies. But she’s trying her best to keep me in existence, so what choice do I have?.
So, given all the facts, I’m sure you want to see justice done for all the parties concerned …
Right. I hereby request the order in this case be stricken and that a mediator be appointed, so the parties to the publishing business can figure out what the fuck they’re doing how to run an effective business, so authors and readers can continue to be able to choose their own devices, so to speak.
Respectfully submitted,
Stephanie Ann “Sam” McRae, Esq.
PS: Here’s a message to my bad author who wrote that part where I had the crap beaten out of me in that bestselling novel of yours. Thanks a whole lot, shithead.
Me: Well, I guess that proves the old maxim: An attorney who represents herself (albeit through her own fictional character) has a fool for a client.
Thank you, Hugh Howey! Judging from the comments, I must add that it’s not impossible to sell large numbers of ebooks through means other than Kindle. In fact, by limiting yourself to selling through Kindle, you’re playing right into Amazon’s apparent plan to monopolize the market.
Hello! Is this mic on?
Part of the problem is that publishers are using a fucked up business model, and trying to compete with a massive technology company. Thus, it makes way more sense for authors to sell directly to readers. I’ve tried to explain this. Over and over. This will save my gimpy ass the typing.
UPDATE 2: Okay. I’m back from seeing Jenny Lawson, which as I waited through her talk was (to be honest) totally freaking me out, except I kept thinking, “Why are you freaking out? Good grief.”
So, when I stood in line, I kept thinking about what I’d say when I met her, because I’ve been reading her blog ever since forever a long time. In point of fact, I discovered her blog, the way I described here.
I’ll also never forget that Jenny followed me on Twitter when I tweeted this post.
What a thrill!
So … while we sat there, listening to Jenny (or trying to, while someone was beating her kid’s back like a drum behind us to keep him/her from crying — apparently), all these memories were in the back of my mind. Which is why I decided to bring an offering for Jenny. But I don’t have any taxidermied (sp?) animals. So, I brought my own copy of Doctor Who: The Episode Guide, which I got for making a donation to Maryland Public Television.
Plus, I signed a copy of my New York Times (ebook) bestselling bookIDENTITY CRISIS, to give her, as well. I signed it in line waiting, because I was afraid my gimpy hands would hold things up even more than my rambling, stupid speech to The Bloggess would.
So … when I finally got to stand beside Jenny, I was nearly dumbstruck. So, I think I said, “I can’t believe I’m here.” Or something. Which sounds really stupid, now that I think of it. Anyway, I blurted out some words. Jenny was so nice. I mentioned about the book and Doctor Who and having a stroke at Barnes & Noble, which I emphasized had saved my life, just to be clear about that.
And when I gave her my book, I mentioned that I have two others in the series. And I asked if she liked mysteries, and she said yes! Yay!!!
So, I asked if she had an ereader, and she said she did. So, I said, “Well, download away!” Which seems like a really retarded dumb thing to say at a book signing. I didn’t mention any particular devices. Don’t ask, don’t tell. Ha ha ha …
At one point, I said I knew what it was like to be #furiouslyhappy every day, and I looked directly at her and said, “I understand how it feels to suffer.” I felt like I wanted to say more, but what more was there to say? Then, before I knew it, my husband was taking pictures of us.
I wish I could post them, but he took them with his phone. And both us are too technically stupid to figure out how to get them from the phone to his computer. But he’ll do it. Eventually. I hope.
Of all the things I didn’t bring, one would be a damn camera.
So … try to picture me …
Without the hat, in a green shirt, in a Barnes & Noble squatting beside this woman …
Except she’s seated, wearing different clothes and no handcuffs.
"Midlist is a term in the publishing industry which refers to books which are not bestsellers but are strong enough to economically justify their publication (and likely, further purchases of future books from the same author). The vast majority of total titles published are midlist titles, though they represent a much smaller fraction of total book sales, which are dominated by bestsellers and other very popular titles. Authors who consistently publish acceptable but not bestselling books are referred to as Midlist authors." ~ Wikipedia
Well, I think it’s time to drop the proverbial curtain on the show, as it were. Ha ha ha …
So, I brought my own copy of 
